My objection however is that this narrative is not about a leader making what others perceive as mistakes or leading with preferences that others would not prefer. The narrative is about a leader who is broken, Godless, only self-serving, deeply insecure, evil. Most of us will spend our entire lives and never encounter such a dynamic. Yes, we will encounter flawed leaders, but seldom ones who have utterly forsaken God and have embraced occult practices.
So where is the relevance of this story to us? I believe its greatest relevance is in what NOT to do, especially with Jonathan. As a father, I am going to tell my children, if I am ever as wrong as a Saul with my life, don't die on the mountain with me, stand and lead with a David! If I am ever as broken as a Saul, live and serve God with a David! If I am ever as lost as a Saul, pray for me, reach out to me, don't give up on me, but don't die in vain with me... find a David!
Did David act inappropriately by continually deferring to Saul? Not if he was acting on the conviction of his heart born out of a mandate by God spoken to him. And I believe that is exactly what he was doing. But the mistake we make is not discerning what God intended to be a lesson in obedience with Him at a personal level and creating a model for how all people of all times are always supposed to deal with tragic leadership. David's burden was David's burden. It may not be yours or mine when facing leaders that are so flawed that they are a danger to themselves and others.
I am not advocating rebellion. I am not advocating violating confidences. I am not advocating harming the dignity of others. Scripture gives us steps with beautiful clarity for how we are to engage others in a process of discussion of our differences. It should be private, respectful, loving, with humility, and never with the intent of fracturing the relationship. Even with people who are tragically flawed, the goal is never to be right or usurp authority but to see the person in question fully restored personally. If we take the Scripture as a weapon to bludgeon others with our "moral authority" we are no better than the one we are accusing.
Most differences when it comes to people in leadership are about preferences. Seldom are we disagreeing about doctrine. I like to say that unity is when we let our absolute commonalities transcend our relative dissimilarities. Hymns or modern praise is not an absolute, it is relative based on a person's personal preference, pews or chairs, kjv or niv, robes or slacks...etc! The Deity of Christ is not however relative but a strict absolute, as is the Trinity, the sinfulness of mankind, the efficacy of the Cross...etc! The first step in disagreements with leaders is to discern together whether we are dealing with an absolute truth or something relative.
If it is relative, then someone's preference needs to rule and that is why there are leadership teams in place in churches to to help define the culture of that church. And if it is not what you are looking for, well, that is why there are many different churches. At City Life, we are committed to helping people find the best church for them, even if it isn't us! The other mistake that people make when they are leaving for another church over preferential reasons is in leaving with an attitude that the church was wrong not to change to accommodate them. That is poor and certainly not Christ honoring. When will we leave the playgrounds of elementary school and stop needing others to be wrong to make ourselves feel more right.
News flash...we can both be right when dealing with matters of preference. Let others be free to champion their preferences and you be free to champion your own! And when we are facing tragically flawed leaders, seek God's direction and if He is asking you to help correct it, move with grace, humility, and patience. Don't be in a hurry, the goal is to rescue a life, not win an argument; otherwise, you will find yourself in need of your won rescue.
Galatians 6:1, "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted."
Pastor Fred
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